I Think I Made a Mistake

This morning I saw someone studying PMBR flashcards and I started to cry. It wasn't stomach-wrenching sobs that I was worried I would break into, it was just a couple of tears that I brushed away before anyone saw (I hope) and that feeling that you get in the back of your throat when your eyes are welling up and you are trying to keep people from thinking you are crazy. I think that I have made a mistake in the profession that I chose. I don't know any attorneys who are happy doing the work that they do and I know that I'm not happy with the work that I'm doing so if I get a real job am I going to be happy? If I had guts, I mean real cajones I would just leave the law all together and do something else, but I'm not sure what I want to do. I mean, for seven years I prepared myself for the legal profession. For the past two years I've been struggling to find a job in the legal profession and now I'm crying at the sight of PMBR cards. What I really want to do is go "find" myself but I have loans and bills and responsibilities...and no cajones. I think that law school took them and I don't know what to do.

The Post Office Sucks

I was trying to be a good tenant when I sent my leasing office my notice of intent to vacate. Thinking I was covering my ass, I sent it Certified Mail. The Post Office has let me down and has lost my letter. I thought it was a bit weird when after sending my letter on a Saturday, the leasing office hadn't received it by Tuesday. The Post Office and the leasing office are less than a mile apart. I checked again today and the Post Office still hadn't delivered my letter so I called. The woman on the end was no help. She basically told me that I would have to wait until Friday because 10 days isn't long enough, the Post Office considers something lost after 14 days! FOURTEEN DAYS??!!! Thank God I also hand delivered my letter to the leasing office. This is why I pay my bills online. I want my $2.79 back because they didn't do what they were supposed to do! Yes yes yes, I know that $2.79 is not going to break me, but is the principle of the matter. Next time I'm using Fedex.

Black Stars

Hooray! The Black Stars beat the United States. That is exciting to me. Now, many people are telling me, "I can't believe you are rooting for Ghana in this." Ummm, damn straight I'm rooting for Ghana. Let me tell you why.

1. Ghana is where my parents are from. Any country that has produced two people as wonderful as my parents (who I'm going to see this weekend- yay) deserves my support. Plus, in Ghana you are from the country where your mother was born, so they claim me, why can't I claim them?
2. Ghana is a place where there are NO color lines. If you are white, black, brown, Puerto Rican or Haitian Ghana will welcome you. I can't say the same for the U.S. Also, the minute that the U.S. starts instituting the draft for women, I'm headed straight to my parents' house in Accra, any one who wants to come is welcome, we have room.
3. This is Ghana's first time in the World Cup. This tiny little country in Western Africa is holding its own against the big dogs. The fact that it is a place that I know and love makes me want to bust out my Ghanaian Flag, crank up the high life music and cheer. Now, they are playing Brazil in the next round. I'm not sure how they will do, but I am so proud that they made it this far. Have a marvelous weekend! Ciao!

Endorphins

Whatever they say about exercise and endorphins is true. Before this morning I was having a crappy week. I was exhausted, my body hurt and I couldn't get out of bed. I was cranky, I think I was grinding my teeth in my sleep and the thought of work made me want to cry. Yesterday I almost cursed out a group of Christian tourists at Five Guys. This morning I went to spinning and I feel ten times better. I'm dressed and ready for work, I'm going to the post office and the library before I hit the office and I just feel happy. I'm not sure if my endorphins are released by the actual spin class or for the kick-ass music my instructor plays (my favorite spinning song is the "Nobody's Supposed to Be Here" dance remix) but whatever it is I'll take it!

Meet the Parents

First of all, Happy Father's Day! I wasn't able to go home and be with my Dad because of a bridal shower, but I called him this morning and sent him this HOT present that I know he will love. I also have to shout out the Ghana Black Stars who are doing quite well in the World Cup. They beat the Czech Republic yesterday 2-0!

Today was a pretty good day. I met The Sensation's grandmother, aunts and couple of his cousins. It was hard because they speak French and Creole and they speak fast. I could kind of keep up with the convo but I have to seriously bone up on my French so I can talk to everyone. I also got word that we have an apartment and we can sign a lease in two weeks. It doesn't have a washer and dryer but I compromised because we are going to be living on the top floor! Yay!

1. I love TiVo
2. Britney Spears is a moron.
That is all.

Blessed

I was wallowing today. I mean hardcore wallowing. Then I talked to a friend of mine and realized that my problems are trivial and that I am truly blessed. I will keep him in my prayers and as I pray, I will silently thank him for making me see that when I step back and look at the big picture, my life is actually pretty good.

Contentment

This morning I woke up with Fiji on my left and The Sensation on my right. As I was lying there I realized that I loved this feeling. That's all I need, my man and my cat and maybe some diet coke. I just had this feeling that everything was right with the world. I didn't have any feelings that my weight was too high, my bills were too high, my job was boring, my apartment was too small, nothing. I just felt at peace. It was a nice feeling. Let's hope that I have this feeling more often.

I'm Still Standing

I found the perfect apartment this weekend. There was much rejoicing in the land and The Sensation and I were sooo happy. Now all I had to do was tell my Dad that I was thinking of cohabitating with a man. I had already broached the subject to my mom and she said that I was a grown-up but she would prefer that we get engaged or married first. I figured my dad would say the same kind of thing, but it was extremely awkward telling my dad, the only man I've ever lived with, that I'm going to start living with another man. The conversation was okay. My dad gave his opinion and I didn't get written out of the will, so all went well. I was really nervous but after it was over I felt better and shimmied around my apartment singing Elton John, "I'm Still Standing."

Speaking of gay married men, I just have to vent about this whole Gay Marriage Amendment that the Republicans are trying to pass in the Senate. Okay, I know that it probably isn't going anywhere, but it really burns me up. First of all, who do they think they are to dictate who can get married and who can't? I mean it isn't like the gay folks want to jump on straight people and marry them, so what is the problem? Also, it seems as though the "moral" right wingers are getting caught up in sex scandals and affairs and all kinds of things nowadays. Isn't the saying you shouldn't throw stones if you live in a glass house? Also, with rate of divorce at 50% and rising, it doesn't seem like the straight people are doing a good job. Why not let gay people get married? Who knows, they might do a better job at it than "traditional" marriages.

WW

Well, this week of effecuating change went well. I'm down 2.2 pounds and I'm quite excited about it. I was a bit worried because I had a couple of dinners to go to and I went to Cafe Japone on Friday and had a bit to drink. I guess I was making good choices because it worked. Let's hope that this wasn't just a fluke and I can hang on to the losing streak for week 2.